The "perfect partner" doesn't exist
Photo courtesy of Mindy Sabiston on Unsplash
There is a wealth of evidence to point to the fact that there are no perfect partners out there.
Take the iconic Disney couples, for example: though they are based on the idea of an ideal fairy tale couple, most of them had to make some compromises in their relationship. Ariel literally gave up her identity as a mermaid to be with Eric. Kristoff went through what could be called ‘royal-fication’ to be with Anna. When did we ever see him mine ice again after “Frozen?”
Mulan and Li Shang had to navigate the societal structures of the Chinese military and then deal with the fallout in their relationship in “Mulan II.” Cinderella had to pretend to be rich to even be an option for Prince Charming, because she was a commoner and he was royalty.
Not to mention the fact that the Beast kidnapped Belle’s father and was a beast in the first place because of his selfishness.
If that’s not a red flag, what is? And Tiana and Naveen? Naveen was literally a frog.
Even in “Pride and Prejudice,” one of the most popular literary romances of all time, Mr. Darcy had to be willing to change his judgmental, arrogant ways to earn Elizabeth’s affections, and that wasn’t easy.
One would think that if any couple could have found the one, it would be Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. Even with the ‘star-crossed lovers’ title working for them, they couldn’t make it work and, despite all their attempts to figure something out, failed tragically.
However, there is still hope for people looking to find someone they want to spend the rest of their lives with. Regardless of whether the relationships succeeded or not, each of these examples had one thing in common: they acknowledged what needed attention in the relationship and worked to improve themselves.
Prince Charming put the glass slipper on every girl in the kingdom, even girls he probably wouldn’t have even given a second look before meeting Cinderella. Romeo and Juliet challenged their intense family rivalry to be together. Li Shang broke the law to spare Mulan’s life, and Tiana was willing to sacrifice her dreams to help Naveen.
It’s time to stop propping up the celebrity and fantasy couples that society puts before us, brush aside the notion of the ‘perfect partner’ and acknowledge the real magic at work is seeing someone who isn’t perfect and deciding they’re worth the effort anyway.
Why spend years searching for the person that fits the image you’ve built up in your head? There are 7.89 billion people in the world. The chances that you cross your ideal romantic partner are also one in 7.89 billion, as the numbers work out.
Do you think Romeo’s vision of his ideal wife was a Capulet when he was growing up? Did the Beast dream of becoming a monster so he could fall in love with the town outcast, and would Anna really have said her type was an ice miner with a reindeer?
These characters probably thought they knew what they wanted in a relationship when they began their stories, but in the twists and turns of life, they found someone who challenged them and made them grow into a person they wouldn’t have been otherwise.
In the end, though someone might not technically be the perfect person, it’s possible to find someone who you want to be the perfect person in spite of their flaws, and that is a love more beautiful than someone with the hair color, background or body type you think is ideal.
