By Dave Diamond
Most college athletes will tell you coaches are looked up to as role models. Relationships in sports emerge between teammates. A family-like atmosphere emerges during long practices and team meetings with teammates becoming siblings, and the coach becoming a sort of parental figure. Through this family, a respectful relationship emerges between player and coach that can sometimes move past a compliance to run drills, take laps, and other such sport terms. This friendship, this respect, becomes apparent when tragedy strikes, and we all are reminded that sports suddenly become trivial.
Roman Fleszar is a true example of just how much that relationship can mean. Fleszar, a former All-American Pride wrestler, ran one of the more inspiring drills as any athlete has for their coach in recent memory, the 26.2 mile New York City Marathon. This was no time trial for Fleszar, or just another effort to stay in shape. Fleszar ran for the purpose of showing the true respect and condolences he feels his coach, Tom Ryan, deserves.
Last season, Ryan led the Pride to an undefeated record in conference action and a fourth consecutive conference title. He tied a school record by sending eight wrestlers to the NCAA Championships. However, all that was accomplished in wrestling seemed inconsequential when the Ryan family was struck with a terrible tragedy.
On February 16, 2004 Ryan's five-year-old son, Teague, collapsed and passed away at the family's Long Island home. Teague suffered from Long Q-T Syndrome, which is a hereditary disorder of the heart's electrical rhythm that occurs in seemingly healthy people. Ryan and his family have done their part in becoming American Heart Association (AHA) members to help inform people of Long Q-T Syndrome and other heart defects. Fleszar wished to do his part the best way he knew how.
Fleszar carried Teague's name as one of the more than 30,000 athletes who took the streets of New York from the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge in Manhattan to Tavern on the Green in Queens. When asked what this gesture meant to him and his family, Ryan was nearly speechless. "I loved Roman before he did that," Ryan said, explaining that this only enhanced his appreciation for not only an outstanding athlete, but also an outstanding friend. "I just think it was a great tribute to Teague and my relationship with Roman," he added. That relationship started when Fleszar was one of the nation's top wrestling recruits coming out of high school. It was then that Ryan learned the type of person Fleszar truly was.
"He believed in my vision of [Pride] Wrestling before we had any proof that it could happen. He's one of those guys that said 'I'm going to go to Hofstra despite that fact that tradition has been down lately' and despite the fact that there were more proven places for him to be the best," Ryan said. From the way Fleszar made his "unique" decision, Ryan respected him immediately, and their relationship grew from there.
Any topic related to the passing of his son is obviously very difficult for Ryan to talk about, but a topic related to Roman Fleszar is another story. Ryan was very happy to speak about his relationship with Fleszar, which not surprisingly, consisted of family terms. "I was kind of the surrogate-father," Ryan said, "I have that kind of relationship with guys on the team." Ryan used the term loosely, taking nothing away from the Fleszar family that raised their son, and praising them in the job they accomplished.
Without question, Ryan is an outstanding coach that has taken Pride wrestling to some of the highest points it has ever been. All that when dealing with a tragedy that brought the moral of his family to their lowest point. Moving on will be a tall task, but fortunately for Tom Ryan, those he touched in his life, like Fleszar, will be there for him to help as best they can. Finally, Ryan did find the words to describe what Fleszars' run did for his family. "I was humbled and inspired by his actions."