By Kendall Gibson COLUMNIST
‘Tension’ – Girl Tears
“Girl Tears is for punk rockers who like it to be bassy and distorted but only bassy and distorted enough. Too much bass and you are playing music for whales, and too much distortion and your album may as well come pre-scratched and skipped. Well, not that anyone uses physical media anymore. Try this music out; it will have you head banging and mumbling happily in a drunk British accent.
If You Like: The Stooges, Iggy Pop, Sonic Youth
‘Syro’ – Aphex Twin
I have yet to understand techno, because whenever I hear a “new” techno song I am tempted to ask “did they make that themselves, or did it come pre-loaded into the keyboard?” It all sounds the same, and do you know why that is not insulting? It is by definition all the same! When you play a beat on a machine rather than on an instrument you are going to have every note sound the same, therefore there is no personal flavor on any note, period. It is all too robotic for me, and I am just going to have to pass.
If You Like: Zeros, Ones, and The Matrix
‘Def Jam 30’
Alright, Santa, this may sound weird but this Christmas I want this. Just this. Why would you only want an album, you ask? Well, let me fill you in a little bit, Santa: if you get me the LP box set it comes with this boss shirt and all this cool packaging, AND on top of that all of the music on here is pure f****** gold. I only ask you, Santa because it’s $140 and I know you got cash.
If You Like: LL Cool J, DMX, Beastie Boys, Rick Ross, Jay-Z