By The Chronicle Staff
In the Student Center:
Girl: Did you see how big that girl's boobs were? They were like popping out of her shirt.
Guy: Oh yeah.
Girl: Why'd you look at them?!
Outside Dempster Hall:
Guy: Going on a lunch date with Rabinowitz is seriously on my bucket list.
Girl: Your mustache is so weird. It makes you look like my cousin.
Guy: Then why did you make out with me an hour ago?
On the Unispan:
Girl 1: Wow, she lost a lot of weight.
Girl 2: Eh, I don't like when people start randomly losing weight. It creeps me out.
In the Library:
Guy 1: She's such a dramatic and condescending b--h sometimes, it's so frustrating.
Guy 2: Leave the chick, dude.
Guy 1: Nah, the sex is too good.
Professor: What do you think is hindering Donald Trump's chance of running for President?
Student: His hair.