By Compiled by The Chronicle Staff
In Enterprise Hall:
Girl #1: ...but four pregnancy tests can't be wrong!
Girl #2: I don't know... did your diet change?
In the Student Center:
Guy #1: What are you talking about? Rock isn't a real person.
Guy #2: Yes he is! He ended the Cold War!
In Salem House:
Guy #1: So I hooked up with Michelle last night.
Guy #2: Oh! You mean Michelle [last name]! I hooked up with her last year.
Guy #1: So she's like the village bicycle?
Guy #2: If the village was a vibrating seat, yeah.
In Dempster Hall:
Girl #1: I've been doing so good with my diet!
Girl #2: Good for you!
Girl #1: Yeah, I haven't been drinking liquids...only water!
In Student Center:
Lackmann Employee: That's cheese. I asked for tiny pumpkins.